Inner Strength

RPSVpoetry 12:07:20

This poem is dedicated to all of the women who have experienced tragedy, walked through a field of thorns barefoot, and struggled to keep their sanity from the post-traumatic stresses that have overwhelmed them throughout the years. You’ve endured an unbearing weight filled with endless heartache, sleepless nights, and have walked through maelstroms of agonizing pain.

Believe me when I say this. I see you, I hear you, and I appreciate each and every one of you. -Rabbit

You’ve been down this road before.
You’ve familiarized yourself with the patterns and repetitive actions of the person that you thought you loved.
Stumbling through the front door, tripping over nothing, and now that person’s sleeping on the floor.
You can’t take it anymore, the lucid dreams that control you.
You, the one who’s been beaten to a pulp, driven into a corner, so now your body is beaten black and blue.
A heart that’s been bruised, crushed by mechanical hands, nails that have been bitten down to the core of your fingers.
You give them your all but now it’s as if all of your actions have been hindered.
Locked up inside of a mental cell, you pray at night asking for forgiveness,

Living in a world that’s gone up in flames, so now it’s like you’re in burning in hell.
Caught up in a chaotic storm that’s got you by the hands, unable to let go.
“You’ve got to push through this, it’s just another day,”
“Maybe he won’t do it again…”
“He said that he’s sorry and that he’ll try to fix things.”

You’ve got to let go, but you don’t know if you should.
What about the children?
What about your parents? What about your in-laws?
Too afraid that he’ll break the family apart,

Terrified that it’ll destroy all of the love that you’ve got inside of your poor, breaking, and fragile heart.
How did this all begin? How did this even start?
It was picture perfect. You fell in love at a young age.

Promised you forever, in health and sickness,
But now that person’s looking for another quick fix.
Just another high, disappearing for another night.
“You said you’d come back, but you’re never really here.”
A thousand jars filled with your tears,
An absent presence who’s incapable of whispering sweet nothings into your ear.
Ongoing suffering, so now you’re all alone.
With no one to catch you before you fall, an empty house that doesn’t feel like home.
A stranger, not a lover.
A young, reckless decision.
Gotta sew it back up, see a doctor, swallow the pills, brace for the incision.
Now you’re medicated. The pain that’s been afflicted has become a twisted obsession.
Too used to the abuse so now it’s like an addiction.
Intoxicating lust fills your lungs, you’re not used to something new.
Seeking for a luckless romance, too afraid for too many years to accept the horrifying truth.
A kindred spirit, a soul that’s been ruptured and broken into two.
Too many pieces of a shattered world, trying to piece back together but it’s no use.
Not used to healing so you mask it all away, the mascara that’s used for concealing.
A getaway to hide away from the discomfort that’s stuck inside of your aching chest.
Throbbing sorrow overfills your ocean eyes,
Treading carefully because you’ve spent breathless moments gasping for air,
Tortured and suffocating from a person that’s killed you over and over again on the inside.
But I’m here to tell you, to remind you that it’s okay to cry.
It’s okay to feel weak and vulnerable.
Those are the things that make us strong.
Our flaws and all of the times we’ve had to scream out and fall.
We’re stuck in the middle of a warzone that seems never-ending.
Never-ending chaos that fills our heads with deception and dishonesty.
Covering our eyes and ears to an explicit and violent reality.
So I’m here to tell you, to remind you that it’s okay to feel like you’re crazy.
You got caught up in a made-up fantasy.
Swooned by the fabricated stories about love and attachments.
Swayed by persuasion so now you’re inflicted with one too many abrasions.
Wounded on the battlefield, but you still got up.
You’ve endured so much, but don’t give up.
Get back up, fight against all odds, and unglue your feet from where you’ve been stuck.
Healthy isn’t in your dictionary, so it feels like fiction.
Shot you down with a rain of arrows, struck by cupid, now the poison seeps in and you’ve been inflicted.
You’ve worn this old bandaid for years, time to tear it apart, just let it all go and rip it.
Jump down the zip line and free yourself from the restraints.
They don’t owe you anything. You owe yourself the freedom of choices and to walk away from the pain.
It’s a beautiful pain. A tender scar that will heal as long as you allow it to heal.
It’s a nightmarish terror, and yes it was real,
But that shouldn’t define who you are and how you should feel.
There’s an indescribable beauty inside of you, and yes, I know that beauty’s overrated.
But it’s the beauty of your soul and so I’m just here to remind you that you’ve made it.
There are no boundaries, no lengths.
Because within you is an incredible source;
An unbeatable, undefeatable source of inner strength.